Today is beach day! I’m so excited! The sand feels good in my hands, but weird all over my feet. Mom is telling me to calm down because I’m so angry.
I don’t know why I feel like screaming but the stupid sand should stop going on my feet. Mom is helping me make sand castles. Hers are better than mine. Now I’m so mad that I’m shaking and I start to cry.
Mom grits her teeth, “Aubrey, stop it. It’s not a contest!” I don’t understand her. We’re close to the water and it’s very loud. The sand is still all over my feet. And why is she telling me to stop a contest? I won’t win if I stop. This doesn’t make sense and there’s so much happening now. I yank my hair.
Aiden runs up to us, showing us things that are crawling around in his bucket. He talks loudly and covers my voice. Why does he always do that? I shout, “Aiden, shut up!” He pushes my arm too hard and calls me a “brat.” I want a new brother.
Then I spot a seashell and some green stuff that my mom calls, “seaweed.” I begin using them for my castles. I feel really happy again. I wipe my tears with my hands. I like when the happy feeling comes so fast. I hate it when the mad feeling is even faster.
Oh no. I just got sand in my eyes. I scream again because it hurts. Mom asks, “Aubrey, what’s wrong now?” I know what I wanna say, but the words won’t come out. This makes me even angrier. Screaming helps me feel better.
Mom is rubbing my back, “It’s ok, Aubrey. Please use your words so I can help you.” But my skin feels like there are bugs crawling under it. I shake her off and smack her hard in that arm. Why doesn’t she help me? It hurts so much.
Now Mom looks at me like she’s worried. What is she worried about? She doesn’t have sand in her eyes. Aiden splashes water in my face and I feel better. He rolls his eyes at Mom, “Mom, she had sand in her eyes. Didn’t you see that?”
Aiden is a nice big brother. I love him so much. And I feel really happy again. I hope this feeling lasts longer this time. I’ve heard my mom and dad talk about Aiden a lot. They took him to special doctors and he took a test.
Now they say that he has a few things that make his brain work differently. I can’t remember what they are. They think I might have one of those things. So my mom took me to those special doctors.
They were nice to me and let me play with their toys. They showed me pictures and asked me questions, but I didn’t take a test. Tests are boring. This was fun.
My mom looked sad when they told her that we have to come back again. But I’m happy because I like going there. Maybe there will be new toys next time.
I’m finished with my sand castles now. Mom smiles at me, “Great job, Aubrey!” I want her to smile like that more often. I hug her and give her a huge smile back. Aiden sits down with us and so does my dad. I feel happy, still. But the sand is itchy on my skin. And my skin feels tight. I’m shaking again.
Jessica S.
Sept. 2019
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