Wednesday, December 30, 2020

The Rebellious Resolutions of the New Year

 Let’s get this over with right now. I’m tired of making New Year’s resolutions that I can only carry out for a few days or the most, one month. Then, I’m filled with guilt and regret that I didn’t last longer as I go back to the lifestyle I was living before the big ball dropped in Times Square. Here you will find my most honest and realistic list of New Year’s Resolutions:

1.     No dieting.

2.     No exercising or joining a gym.

3.     No meditating.

4.     Stop monitoring how much sugar consumed daily.

5.     Quit saying, “It’s okay” when it’s not.

6.     Start using tit-for-tat and I got you back for wrong doers.

7.     Stop being sweet as sugar.

8.     Start being as sour as a lemon (when necessary).

Some might be shocked by this more truthful list of New Year’s Resolutions but before you shoot it down, try it and you’ll see how much happier January will be!

Ellen G.
Dec 2020

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